Why Do Wealth and Children Distract Us? A Warning from Surah Al-Munafiqun

6 September 2021

Do Our Words Resemble the Way We Live?

People can choose beautiful words when describing themselves. They can advocate honesty, mutual help, and the value of family. But the real question is how these words are reflected in our daily lives. Do we keep our promises? Do we respect the rights of someone who trusts us? Can we acknowledge our mistake when reminded of it? When reading Surah Al-Munafiqun, let us not turn our attention only to the shortcomings of those around us. The distance between words and behavior is also an important warning to examine our own lives. At the center of this lesson is honestly considering what and how we live while professing faith, rather than readily labeling others. Such reflection extends from the image we present outwardly to the intention we carry within.

Someone’s impressive speech may lead us to trust immediately. They act warmly toward us, use familiar words, and speak of shared values. These can certainly create closeness, but they should not be the entire basis of trust on their own. Over time, we also consider whether they stand behind their word, take responsibility, and how they treat vulnerable people. The same attention applies to ourselves. Merely forming correct sentences does not prove that we behave correctly. Sometimes we do not want to see in ourselves a contradiction we immediately recognize in others. That is why we need to allow the warning we read to reach us first. Knowledge then ceases to be merely a standard by which we classify people.

Acting Arrogantly When an Apology Is Called For

Verse 5 of the surah describes an arrogant attitude that turns away from the call to seek forgiveness. It is not difficult to consider its counterpart in daily life. When a mistake is pointed out to us, we may immediately say, “Are you making a big deal of that? Is that what offended you?” We may move the subject away from our behavior to the other person’s sensitivity. Yet the issue is what we did as much as why they are upset. Getting angry with someone who reminds us of our debt does not remove the debt. Telling a person who says our words hurt them, “You are exaggerating,” does not automatically make our words right. Arrogance sometimes appears less as loud boasting than as being unable to accept even the smallest reminder.

The lesson considers the example of debt. Someone who expects understanding while asking for help may portray the creditor as a nuisance when repayment is due. They behave as though asking for the money is wrong. There is a difference here between explaining one’s difficulty and denying one’s responsibility. If we cannot pay, we can say so honestly, seek an appropriate solution, and show that we take our word seriously. But acting superior, avoiding the issue, or blaming the other person erodes trust. Let us ask ourselves: When I am in difficulty, do I use the understanding shown to me to make my obligation forgotten? Or do I try to respond to that understanding by being more open and responsible?

Someone Else’s Prayer Does Not Replace Our Own Turning Back

As we consider the powerful warning in verse 6, let us also look at expecting help only from outside without changing our own attitude. Someone else praying for us is valuable. But it does not guarantee that we can continue the same behavior without acknowledging our wrong. Asking someone to pray and fulfilling our responsibility toward a person we have harmed cannot replace one another. Seeking forgiveness also requires turning inward. We can ask what we did, whom we hurt, and which promise we failed to fulfill. We cannot expect unchanged behavior to become right simply because someone says good words on our behalf. The sincerity of our turning back should be visible in the steps we take in life.

While reading these warnings, let us not assume the authority to pass final judgment on particular people’s inner worlds. We can find a behavior wrong, protect ourselves, and exercise caution concerning trust. But claiming to know a person’s entire intention is a different assertion. Labeling becomes especially easy when we feel hurt. When we do this, there is a danger of justifying our own anger through religious language. What is more beneficial for us is to evaluate observable behavior and attend to our own responsibility. Without minimizing wrongdoing, let us not close the possibility of someone’s turning back with our own hands. We are not the ultimate authority over the accounting. Knowing this boundary helps preserve both justice and humility.

Turning Our Means into an Instrument of Pressure

Verse 7 describes an attitude that calls for withholding assistance from those with the Messenger. The idea of restricting people’s means of livelihood so that they disperse shows how power can become an instrument of pressure. The verse reminds us that the treasures of the heavens and the earth belong to Allah. Acting as though we are the absolute owners of the means in our hands can mislead us. Providing support to someone does not mean that we have purchased their conscience or choices. Forcing people in the direction we want by threatening to withdraw our help damages the spirit of sharing. Sometimes we may do this through a great display of power, sometimes within a small relationship. What matters is recognizing what we are turning our means into.

The following verse considers claims of power and superiority. Being wealthier, more numerous, or more influential within a community does not give people the right to do whatever they want. Let us not confuse respect with intimidation. If people remain beside us only because they fear losing something, this may not be a real bond of trust. Similarly, we do not have to regard everything someone does as right because we need them. When we put power in place of justice, both the powerful and those living dependent upon them suffer. The surah turns our perspective from visible means toward a broader responsibility. How we use what has been given to us matters as much as the thing itself.

Why Are Our Wealth and Children Mentioned?

Verse 9 reminds believers not to let their wealth and children distract them from remembering Allah. Working, establishing a family, or caring for our children is not condemned here. These are real responsibilities in our lives. The central question is whether what we love and possess has taken over every standard. If we push honesty aside for the sake of earning, sacrifice another person’s rights for our child’s wishes, or accept every wrong so as not to lose someone we love, we should pause and think. Is a blessing in our life taking us to a place where we forget the Lord who gave it and the justice He reminds us of? This question calls us to live our love more responsibly.

We may want to grow a business. But if that growth comes at the price of all conversation at home falling silent, we may be overlooking something. When we come home in the evening and still attend only to work, we may fail to hear our child’s actual need. Instead of listening to our spouse’s distress, we may say, “I am already working for you.” Although these words may sometimes carry a right intention, they do not automatically meet the neglected need. Money cannot replace time and attention everywhere. On the other hand, abandoning our work responsibilities is not a solution either. The issue is not doing everything perfectly at once, but recognizing which obligation has become invisible and seeking a fairer arrangement.

The Measure Between Closeness and Excess

Calling our parents, asking how our spouse is, and looking after our child are good things. But if the attention we show one person makes us entirely forget other people’s rights, the balance may be disturbed. Relationships become strained when we continually follow one person’s wishes and never hear another loved one. The solution is not to stop loving someone. It is to learn to live that love without setting our responsibilities against one another. Being unable to fulfill someone’s every wish does not mean that we consider them worthless. Being able to set boundaries when necessary, talk, and try to act justly also belongs within love. We do not have to experience every close relationship in the same way, but let us make none of them a justification for injustice.

A very apt question is also asked in the lesson: If someone constantly attends religious talks and neglects their home and children, is this not also an excess? Yes, participating in an outwardly good activity does not remove our other responsibilities. If an employer seeks people to help outside while never seeing their own employee’s situation, they may have forgotten to look at those close to them. If a family member is out every evening and considers the attention expected at home insignificant, they should return to the same question. Remembering Allah should not make the people entrusted to us invisible. What we learn needs to reach our work, our understanding of wages, our word, and our family life. The connection between worship and behavior then becomes clearer.

The Value of Today for the Goodness We Postpone

Verse 10 reminds us to share from the provision given before death comes. It then describes the person who wishes for a little more time to give charity and be among the righteous. This scene makes us reflect on the value of today’s opportunity. We can always wait for a suitable time. We say, “Let my work improve, let me earn a little more, let this busy period end; then I will attend to it.” But we do not know that everything we postpone will wait for us in the same way in the future. The value of a small good deed we can do today lies, before its size, in its being possible to do. If we have time, knowledge, or financial means, let us ask what we can do with them now. Let us not leave goodness to an imaginary day when every condition will be perfect.

Let us not reduce sharing merely to giving money. Asking how an older person is, visiting a relative, listening to someone who is alone, or teaching something useful we know is also a contribution. Sometimes what a person needs is someone to talk to. At other times, concrete help is required; showing interest cannot replace that need. That is why we should try to understand what is needed. Instead of considering what we do without disturbing our comfort sufficient, let us ask whether we are truly benefiting the person before us. We cannot do everything, but we do not have to do nothing either. Doing justice to what we can do begins with not dismissing small opportunities.

Good Intentions Become Visible in Behavior

Saying, “My heart is pure,” does not mean that everything we do is pure. Our intention matters; so do our words, earnings, and behavior toward people. Hurting someone and then saying, “I meant no harm,” is not always enough. We need to see the effect and correct it if necessary. Let being among the good be a responsibility we continually observe, rather than a title we give ourselves. Let us try not to knowingly take anyone’s rights lightly, mislead someone who trusts us, or use our power to cause harm. When we do a good deed, let us not make it a reason to ignore our other wrongs. A person’s need to correct themselves does not end with one success.

Let us also take seriously the influence of friendships and our surroundings. Not every suggestion that appeals to us may be beneficial. An offer promising great profit can make all the risks and responsibilities invisible. Its being proposed by someone we love does not remove our duty to think. We can ask what is being suggested, whom it benefits and how, and whether an injustice arises. If we have made a wrong choice, we cannot erase our own part merely by saying, “They directed me.” At the same time, the responsibility of the person who misdirected us does not disappear either. We need to look at our own choice without confusing the two parties’ roles. Listening to warnings, investigating, and not rushing are important precautions against great regrets later.

Correcting Our Direction While We Have Time

The final verse of the surah reminds us that death will not be delayed when its appointed time comes, and that Allah is aware of what we do. Instead of reading this only with fear and bringing life to a halt, let us also consider it a call to live today more meaningfully. We still have the opportunity to apologize, learn, share, and turn away from a wrong. Having made mistakes in the past does not require us to close the door of goodness to ourselves. But if we continually say “later,” we will leave our present opportunity unused too. Today we can remember a debt, listen to someone close to us, or help meet a need. Not postponing the right step we can take is the concrete expression of this reminder in our daily lives.

Let us ask our Lord to bring our intention and behavior closer together. Let us ask Him to protect us from arrogance, injustice, showing off, and forgetting blessings. We need not remove wealth, family, and work from our lives; we need to live with them more justly and gratefully. While respecting the rights of those we love, let us not forget the rights of others. Let us not make our earnings, knowledge, and time revolve only around ourselves. Living another day is an opportunity not only to repeat the same habits without thought, but also to correct our direction. Let us do a small good deed today, acknowledge an evident wrong of ours, and fulfill a promise we made. May the warning we read touch our lives in this way.