How Can a Child Move Away from Tablet Dependence? Creating and Taking Responsibility

12 March 2021

Question: Does giving a child everything they want truly make them stronger?

Sometimes, while wanting our children to be comfortable, we take over tasks they could do on their own. Yet trying, making mistakes, and trying again play a major part in a child’s development.

From Ready-Made Entertainment to Creating Their Own Play

Merely telling a child who spends long periods in front of a screen to put down the tablet is not enough. They should have an alternative activity, a real responsibility, and an area to explore.

Question: When a child is bored, do we immediately buy a new toy, or give them an opportunity to think?

A box can be stacked, turned upside down, or made part of a game. When children decide this for themselves, they do more than pass the time; they produce solutions.

Worlds Born from a Cardboard Box

At a school, a large cardboard box that came into the children’s hands was first painted. Then it became a ship, a bus, and an elevator. Over time, it was cut up and transformed into a road and other play areas.

It is thought-provoking that a single box could be used for a long time in place of many expensive toys. For the real value lies not in the box itself, but in the imagination the children build with it and the effort they make.

We do not always need to create the child’s play ourselves.

Contact with the Real World

Coloring a picture on a screen and holding and working with a material are different experiences. Cutting cardboard, painting, planting a seed in a pot, and observing the soil and growth are activities in which children participate with their bodies and attention.

A large garden at home is not necessary. Even a small pot and a little soil can offer a child the opportunity to wait, follow progress, and make an effort.

Nor does a film watched or a book read have to be merely consumed and passed over. We can ask children what they understood and act out a story together with them.

Responsibility Does Not Diminish Love

Children need to learn daily tasks such as carrying their plate, putting away their belongings, or expressing their own needs. Doing everything for them may seem easy in the short term. But they may thereby miss an opportunity to learn.

Even a child telling their teacher when their feet get wet is a learned skill. A child who knows how to ask for help begins to recognize and express their needs.

Question: What will our child be able to do independently when we are not there?

Let us first do a task together. Then let us leave part of it to them. Even if their effort is not perfect, let us give them the opportunity to recognize the value of their own work.

Less, but Meaningful

Simply replacing the screen with another ready-made form of entertainment does not solve the problem entirely. Talking as a family, creating games, making things, and sharing small tasks also strengthen relationships.

The most valuable thing we can leave our child is not having every wish fulfilled, but the confidence they gain that they can do something with what they have.

Which task we do for our child today can we leave to them lovingly but firmly?