Does Allah Love Me?
Imagine a person.
For years, they have devoted themselves to someone they love. They have worked to make that person happy. They have stood by them in difficult times. They have kept watch over them when they were ill. They have helped when they needed money. They have tried to solve their problems. Sometimes they have put their own needs aside; sometimes they have given up their own comfort.
So why has this person done all these things?
Why have they given their time?
Why have they worn themselves out?
Why have they given up their own needs?
Because they loved them.
People make sacrifices because they love. They want the person they love to be well. They do not want them to be sad. If they have a problem, they try to relieve it.
Why does a mother stay awake until morning when her child is ill?
Because she loves her child.
Why does a father work for years for his child’s future?
Because he loves his child.
Why does someone see their spouse’s troubles as their own?
Because they love their spouse.
Why does someone stand by their sibling in difficult times?
Because they love their sibling.
Why does a friend rush to help another friend?
Because they love their friend.
Love is not merely a word we speak. Love also shows itself in our actions.
Now let us think.
For years, a person does all these things for someone they love. But the other person does not see their love. They do not value their kindness. They forget their sacrifices. Sometimes they even do them harm.
What happens?
That person feels deeply hurt.
“I have done so much for you. How can you fail to appreciate me?”
“I have loved you so much. How can you not love me?”
“I was there for you in your hardest days. How can you be ungrateful to me?”
These are the things they say.
So why are they so upset?
Because they want the other person to recognize the love they have been shown.
They want them to appreciate the effort made for them.
They want to be loved.
Now let us stop here.
Because this is precisely where the issue we really need to think about begins.
While we are so upset by people’s ingratitude toward us, how aware are we of our own ingratitude toward Allah?
Why Do We Devote Ourselves to Those We Love?
Let us imagine a mother.
She has brought her child into the world. Raised them. Fed them. Cared for them when they were ill. Stayed awake at night. Worked for years so they could have a good life.
The child has grown up.
But they do not call their mother.
They do not care for her.
They do not value the sacrifices she has made.
One day, their mother says:
“I spent years raising you. I kept watch over you when you were ill. I endured so many difficulties for you. When I love you this much, how can you treat me this way?”
We can understand this mother’s hurt.
Now let us imagine a father.
He has worked for years so his child could receive a good education. He has tried to meet their needs. He has gone without many things he wanted, but has met his child’s needs.
When the father grows old, the child does not care for him.
The father is upset.
“I worked all these years for my child. They will not even spare a single day for me.”
That is what he says.
Let us imagine a spouse.
For years, they have stood by their partner. They have never left them alone in sickness or health, in hardship or joy.
But one day, their spouse betrays them.
That person says:
“I loved you so much. I made so many sacrifices for you. How could you treat me this way?”
Let us imagine a sibling.
They have found their sibling a job. Helped them pay their debts. Supported them in difficult times. But one day, their sibling wrongs them.
They say the same thing:
“Think of everything I have done for you. How can you be ungrateful to me?”
There is something common to all these examples.
People do good because they love.
But they become upset when they see that their love is not returned.
They regard forgetting the kindness shown to someone as ingratitude.
Now let us turn these examples toward our own lives.
So What Has Allah Given Us?
We can list, one by one, the acts of kindness we have done for someone.
“I was there for you when you were ill that day.”
“You needed money then, and I helped.”
“I solved that problem of yours.”
“I gave this up for you.”
But can we count the blessings Allah has given us?
Let us think back to before we were even born.
Did we create our mother?
Did we create our father?
Did we prepare the conditions that would bring us into the world?
No.
We came into the world when we knew nothing, could do nothing, and were unable to protect ourselves.
We needed a mother, a father, a family.
We needed nourishment to grow.
We needed to breathe.
We needed water.
We needed sleep.
Did we prepare the world that made all of this possible?
No.
Now let us think a little more.
Allah has given us eyes.
We can see.
He has given us ears.
We can hear.
He has given us a tongue.
We can speak.
He has given us reason.
We can think.
He has given us memory.
We can remember.
He has given us the feeling of love.
We can love.
He has given us the feeling of compassion.
We can feel another person’s pain.
So which of these did we create ourselves?
None of them.
A person can buy their child a house.
They can buy a car.
They can help them start a business.
But can they create eyes for their child?
Can they create ears?
Can they create reason?
Can they create the feeling of love?
No.
Here is a very important truth that people need to reflect on.
We expect love and loyalty in return for the limited kindness people show us. So what do we do in return for the countless blessings Allah has given us?
Has Allah Created Only What We Need to Survive?
In verse 10 of Surah Luqman, Allah describes the heavens, the mountains on earth, living creatures, rain, and plants.
Now let us think.
A person needs water to live.
Allah has created water.
They need nourishment.
Allah has created all kinds of plants, fruits, and other sources of food on earth.
They need to breathe.
Allah has created a world with conditions in which human beings can live.
But this is not only about meeting our needs.
Let us think a little more.
What would our lives be like if just one kind of food were enough to nourish us?
Yet there are so many different fruits.
There are apples.
There are pears.
There are oranges.
There are grapes.
There are strawberries.
There are figs.
And each of them has a different taste.
A different fragrance.
A different color.
Now let us ask.
Why are there so many different tastes?
Why are there so many different colors?
Why are there so many different fragrances?
Is a flower simply existing the same as its existing in beautiful colors and fragrances?
Why can someone feel happy when looking at a flower?
Why do they enjoy tasting a fruit?
Why can they feel peace when looking at a beautiful landscape?
Verses 27–28 of Surah Fatir draw attention to the different colors of fruits, mountains, people, and animals.
Verse 6 of Surah An-Nahl speaks of beauty in the appearance of livestock.
Verse 6 of Surah As-Saffat describes the sky being adorned with stars.
Verse 16 of Surah Al-Hijr states that the sky has been adorned for those who look at it.
Now imagine looking up at the sky one night.
We see the stars.
We see the moon.
We gaze at the beauty of the sky.
But are we aware of this beauty?
Or have we become so accustomed to it that we no longer think about it at all?
What does someone want when they buy flowers for the spouse they love, when they give them a beautiful gift?
They want their spouse to be happy.
They want their spouse to notice the gift and appreciate it.
So what do we feel in the presence of all this beauty Allah has created?
Do we look at the beauty of a flower and remember Allah?
Do we taste a fruit and give thanks?
Do we reflect on Allah’s creation as we watch the stars at night?
Or do we regard all these things as ordinary things that are simply supposed to be there?
Here is the question we need to ask ourselves:
How much of the beauty Allah offers me do I actually see?
We Even Learned to Love Through the Abilities Allah Gave Us
Now let us come to what may be the most important part of this subject.
Why do we help people?
Why do we make sacrifices for our spouse?
Why do we protect our child?
Why do we try to solve our sibling’s problems?
Because we love.
But how did we learn to love?
Did we create the feeling of love ourselves?
Let us think about a mother’s love for her child.
Let us think about a father’s concern for his child.
Let us think about someone missing their spouse.
Let us think about someone feeling sorrow for their sibling.
Let us think about a friend rejoicing in another friend’s happiness.
What precious feelings all these are in our lives.
In verse 21 of Surah Ar-Rum, Allah describes the love and mercy between spouses as one of His signs.
This means we need to reflect on love and mercy too.
Now let us ask this question.
If we can show love to the people we love, why can we be so neglectful in showing our love for Allah, who gave us this feeling of love?
A person can turn to their spouse and say:
“I love you so much.”
They can say this.
They can embrace their child and say:
“My darling, I love you so much.”
They can say this.
To their mother:
“Dear Mom, I love you so much.”
They can say this.
But when was the last time we sincerely said:
“My Allah, I love You so much.”
When did we say it?
When did we say it while truly feeling it?
Not only when a wish of ours came true.
Not only when our troubles passed.
Not only when we were happy.
When did we say it while thinking about the life, creation, blessings, love, and mercy we have been given?
Perhaps this is the real shortcoming we need to focus on.
We expect love from people.
But how much do we think about our love for Allah?
We Are Angry at People’s Ingratitude. But What About Our Own?
Imagine a person.
For years, they have helped their sibling.
But their sibling has been ungrateful to them.
That person is deeply upset.
“I have done so much for you. How can you fail to see my love?”
That is what they say.
Now let us think about that same person’s relationship with Allah.
Allah has given them life.
Given them health.
Given them reason.
Given them the ability to love.
Created a world they can live in.
Created the heavens, stars, rain, plants, and animals.
Created different tastes, colors, and fragrances.
So how much does this person think about all of these things?
Perhaps they never think about them at all.
But when something they want in life does not happen, they say:
“Does Allah love me?”
This is where a person needs to face themselves.
We regard it as ingratitude when someone forgets a few acts of kindness we have done for them.
So what is it when we forget the countless blessings Allah has given us?
We become angry when someone fails to see our love.
So what is it when we ignore the blessings Allah has given us?
We are upset when someone does not thank us.
So how much do we give thanks to Allah?
In verse 34 of Surah Ibrahim, Allah states that if we tried to count His blessings, we could not count them. At the end of the verse, human beings are described as deeply unjust and ungrateful.
Let us reflect on this verse for a moment.
Allah’s blessings cannot be counted.
Yet human beings can be ungrateful.
What a thought-provoking situation.
A person can forget the kindness they have received.
Yet they do not forget the harm others have done to them for years.
They remember, one by one, the sacrifices they have made for someone.
Yet they struggle to remember the blessings Allah has given them.
And then they can question Allah’s love.
So is the only thing to question here whether Allah loves us? Or is it how ungrateful we have been toward Allah?
Before Asking, “Does Allah Love Me?”
Now let us return to our opening example.
A person has been kind to their spouse for years.
Their spouse has not loved them.
The person has been hurt.
A mother has devoted years to her child.
Her child has been ungrateful to her.
The mother has been upset.
Someone has helped their sibling.
Their sibling has failed to recognize their love and effort.
They have been hurt.
We can understand these people’s hurt.
Because people want to be loved by the person they love.
Now let us think about the blessings Allah has given us.
Allah has created us.
He has given us a world we can live in.
He has given us more blessings than we can count.
He has given us people we can love and the ability to love.
And after all of this, we turn and ask:
“Does Allah love me?”
That is what we ask.
Here, there is a far more important question we need to ask ourselves:
“Do I love Allah?”
But let us not answer this question only with our words.
Because a person can say “I love you” to their spouse and still betray them.
A child can say “I love you” to their mother and still violate her rights.
Someone can say “I love you” to their sibling and still oppress them.
So love is not measured by words alone.
It must also show itself in actions.
If we say that we love Allah, where is that love in our lives?
How do we use the reason Allah has given us?
How do we use the tongue Allah has given us?
How do we treat the people Allah has created?
Do we respect people’s rights?
Do we act justly?
Do we show mercy?
Do we avoid lying?
When we hurt someone, do we feel responsible for it?
Because our love for Allah cannot consist only of saying beautiful words to Him.
We also need to bring the actions Allah loves into our lives.
Verse 31 of Surah Al ‘Imran connects love for Allah with following the Prophet.
This verse reminds us that love cannot be considered separately from actions.
A person who loves also cares about what their beloved values.
When Questioning Allah’s Love, Let Us Not Blame Allah for Other People’s Wrongs
Now we need to touch on another issue.
A person is betrayed by their spouse.
They say, “Why did Allah allow this?”
A person suffers oppression from their sibling.
They say, “Why did Allah not protect me?”
A mother experiences ingratitude from her child.
She says, “Does Allah not love me?”
Of course, people become deeply upset at such times.
They suffer.
They ask questions.
They may even struggle to understand what has happened to them.
But we must make an important distinction here.
Someone doing us harm does not mean that Allah has done us harm.
Someone betraying us does not mean that Allah does not love us.
Because the person doing wrong is responsible for their own actions.
The Qur’an states that Allah does not wrong anyone. (An-Nisa 4:40)
It explains that Allah is not unaware of what the wrongdoers do. (Ibrahim 14:42)
It states that Allah does not love the wrongdoers. (Al ‘Imran 3:57)
Now let us think.
When someone betrays us, why do we make that person’s wrongdoing a measure of Allah’s love?
Allah has given us the ability to love.
But the other person may have abused that love.
Allah has given us reason.
But someone may have used their reason to harm others.
Allah has given us the ability to speak.
But someone may have used that ability to lie.
We need to place responsibility where it belongs.
Of course, “Why does Allah not prevent every evil?” is a broader and more difficult question. We cannot claim to know all the reasons behind every event.
But there is something we do know.
People are responsible for their own choices.
And Allah does not approve of oppression.
So, rather than losing our love for Allah because of other people’s wrongs, we should try to understand what we experience correctly.
This does not mean remaining silent about oppression, either.
People can seek their rights.
They can protect themselves.
They can stand against injustice.
Because Allah also commands justice.
A Person Living in Abundance Should Ask Themselves the Same Question
Now let us not think only of people who are suffering.
Let us also think of someone who has many things in life.
They are healthy.
Their work is going well.
They are at peace with their family.
They have ample financial means.
There are people around them who love them.
So how grateful is this person to Allah?
Sometimes people become so accustomed to the blessings they have that they no longer even think of them as blessings.
They get up in the morning.
They open their eyes.
They breathe.
They have breakfast.
They go to work.
They return home in the evening.
They talk to the people they love.
But they never think about the conditions that make all this possible.
They see everything as though it happens on its own.
This is where the Qur’an’s warnings about people considering themselves self-sufficient become important.
Verses 6–7 of Surah Al-‘Alaq state that people can transgress when they consider themselves self-sufficient.
Verse 78 of Surah Al-Qasas describes Qarun attributing his wealth to his own knowledge.
Verses 15–17 of Surah Al-Fajr reject the idea that abundance is a sign of Allah honoring a person and hardship a sign of humiliating them.
So neither abundance nor hardship alone is a measure of Allah’s love.
What really matters is how people use what they have been given.
A person may be wealthy.
Yet they may be grateful.
A person may be poor.
Yet they may be grateful.
A person may experience great hardship.
Yet they may preserve their love for Allah.
A person may be very successful.
Yet they may forget their responsibility toward Allah.
So we should not assess ourselves only by looking at what happens to us.
We should also look at our own actions.
Wisdom and Gratitude: The Truth Surah Luqman Reminds Us Of
Now let us come to verse 12 of Surah Luqman.
Allah states that He gave Luqman wisdom and reminds him to be grateful.
The rest of the verse states that whoever gives thanks does so for their own good, and that if anyone is ungrateful, Allah is in need of nothing.
We need to pay particular attention to this verse.
Because there is an important difference between our relationships with people and our relationship with Allah.
A person wants to receive love from the person they love.
They want their kindness to be recognized.
They want to be thanked.
But Allah does not need our love, our thanks, or our gratitude.
The blessings Allah has given us do not mean that He needs us to give Him something in return.
We are the ones who need to be grateful.
Because gratitude means becoming aware of what we have been given.
Ingratitude means ignoring these blessings.
This is where wisdom comes in.
A wise person does not merely consume what they are given.
They think about its value.
They think about where it comes from.
They think about how they should use it.
If people appreciate their reason, they try not to use it for evil.
If they appreciate their ability to speak, they try not to lie.
If they appreciate their strength, they try not to oppress the weak.
If they appreciate the feeling of love, they try not to betray the people they love.
Because gratitude is not only saying “Alhamdulillah.”
Of course, saying this is very valuable.
But gratitude must also be reflected in our lives.
Using Allah’s blessings properly is also part of gratitude.
How Much Do We Love Allah?
Now let us put all our wishes aside for a moment.
Let us imagine that we are not asking Allah for anything right now.
We are not asking for money.
We are not asking for status.
We are not asking for a problem to be solved.
Nor are we asking for a hardship in our lives to be removed.
We are simply thinking about what we have been given up to this day.
Our coming into the world.
Our mother.
Our father.
Our childhood.
Our eyes.
Our ears.
Our reason.
Our ability to love.
Our ability to laugh.
Our ability to cry.
Our ability to taste a fruit.
Our ability to smell a flower.
Our ability to hear a person’s voice.
Our ability to see a child’s smile.
The sky.
The stars.
The rain.
The seas.
The mountains.
The trees.
Let us think about all of these.
Now let us ask ourselves.
Which of these did we create ourselves?
For which of them can we fully repay what we have received?
Which of them do we truly appreciate?
Verse 34 of Surah Ibrahim states that we cannot count Allah’s blessings.
Verse 18 of Surah An-Nahl reminds us of the same truth.
So we are unable even to count the blessings we have been given.
In the face of all this, will we be content merely to ask:
“Does Allah love me?”
Will that be all we ask?
Or will we now say something else?
“My Allah, I love You so much.”
Because You are the One who created me.
You are the One who gave me this life.
You are the One who created the people I can love.
You are the One who gave me the ability to love.
You are the One who created the beauty I can see.
You are the One who created the flavors I can taste.
You are the One who made it possible to think, learn, and show compassion.
I may not have appreciated all these things enough.
At times, I may have forgotten what I have.
At times, I may have looked only at what I lack.
At times, while thinking about the harm others have done to me, I may have ignored the blessings You have given me.
But now I want to become aware of them.
Now I want to turn to You not only to ask of You, but also to give thanks to You.
Now I want not only to ask, “Does Allah love me?” but also to think, “How can I show my love for Allah?”
Conclusion: Those Who Expect Love Should Also Question Their Own Love
A person devotes years to someone they love.
They help them.
They try to solve their problems.
They make sacrifices for their happiness.
But when the other person ignores all this, they feel deeply hurt.
They say, “Why do you not see my love?”
Should that same person not now turn to themselves and ask this question?
“How much of the blessings Allah has given me do I see?”
Because we expect loyalty from people.
But we can forget to question our own loyalty toward Allah.
We expect love from people.
But we can neglect to show our love for Allah.
We become angry at people’s ingratitude.
But we can struggle to recognize our own ingratitude.
This is one of the important conclusions we can reach when reflecting on verses 10–12 of Surah Luqman.
Allah describes creation.
He reminds us of the blessings given to human beings.
Then He speaks of wisdom and gratitude.
Our duty is not merely to see these blessings, but to appreciate them and arrange our lives accordingly.
Of course, people may ask Allah questions when they are suffering. Asking these questions alone does not mean they are ungrateful.
But if we continually ignore the countless blessings Allah has given us and question His love only when our own wishes are not fulfilled, there is a serious misunderstanding here.
Perhaps we now need to change our question.
Alongside the question “Does Allah love me?”, or even before it:
“How much do I love Allah?”
And more importantly:
“How do I show my love for Allah?”
Because people make sacrifices out of love.
They help out of love.
They protect out of love.
They show mercy out of love.
And true love shows itself in a person’s actions.
So our love for Allah should not remain only on our tongues.
It should be visible in our gratitude.
It should be visible in our justice.
It should be visible in our compassion.
It should be visible in how we treat people.
It should be visible in how we use the blessings we have been given.
If we call it ingratitude when people fail to see our love, we must accept that ignoring the countless blessings Allah has given us may also be our own ingratitude.
And perhaps today, for the first time, without asking for anything, simply thinking about what we have been given, we should say:
“My Allah, I love You so much. I thank You for all these blessings You have given me. And now I want to show this love not only through my words, but also through the life I live.”